Why Pleasing the Majority Is a Risk Factor for Burnout, Anxiety, and Depression
People-pleasing quietly drives burnout and anxiety. Discover why it disconnects you from what matters and how a mindset shift restores clarity and well-being.
Martin Mwenda
1/1/20261 min read
One difficult truth many of us learn too late is this: it is impossible to please everyone.
Yet for many people, pleasing those around them becomes a dominant motivation—often without conscious awareness.
This drive is rooted in a deeply human need: the desire to belong, to be accepted, and to avoid rejection. While this need is natural, it comes with a hidden cost when it begins to govern our decisions, boundaries, and priorities.
When we try to please everyone, we slowly disconnect from ourselves and from the people and values that truly matter. Energy that should be invested in meaningful relationships, purposeful work, and personal well-being gets diluted across endless expectations. Over time, this depletion shows up as emotional fatigue, anxiety, burnout, and in some cases, depression.
The paradox is striking:
In trying to please the many, we often lose the capacity to fully show up for the few who matter most.
A critical mindset shift is learning to prioritize intentionally. This means identifying the people, commitments, and responsibilities that align with your values and purpose—and allocating most of your emotional, mental, and relational resources there. A simple but powerful rule is this: invest 80% of your energy in the people and pursuits that truly matter.
In the book Mindshift: How to Transform Life’s Setbacks into Growth and Progress, the 5As Growth and Change Model offers a structured pathway for rediscovering self-alignment, restoring well-being, and breaking patterns that quietly lead to stagnation—one of which is the habit of trying to please everyone.
As you prepare for 2026, consider this: success is not about meeting every expectation placed on you. It is about living and leading from clarity, responsibility, and intentional choice.
📘 Get a copy of Mindshift: How to Transform Life’s Setbacks into Growth and Progress on Amazon @ https://a.co/d/aUAn7Zs or contact us @ https://mindshift.co.ke/contact for a hard copy as you begin your journey toward growth, balance, and meaningful progress in the year ahead.